Well the story goes that I used to go up to the movie theatres with a few mates and we would pool all our money and then buy like 150ml bottles of Jim Beam or Southern Comfort. I was fourteen at the time. The person who bought the drink was most usually me, as for some reason I "looked older" or more likely the woman at the bottle shop simply turned a blind eye.
So we would scurry down away from the theatre and with a can of coke or sprite drink our bourbon in horrible burning gulps followed by cooling slurps of soft drink. My eyes would water, my mouth would sting, but I would have this overwhelming feeling of warmth and strength and like a lighglobe had gone off in my head like a PING!
Some of my mates would vomit soon after, or stagger away and vomit where they would not be seen, but not me. I would keep the whole stinking mixture of bourbon and coke in my stomach and breathe shallow and pant so that it would stay down.
After a cigarette or two, I would be ready to stand up; I was even careful to not spit out a single drip of the stringy saliva from my mouth for fear of losing some of the impact! Then, bolstered with a flush of dutch courage, we would tramp up to the theatre and try to coax other young teen girls into fooling around with us.
It was a crude, rushed introduction to sex and was more about the deception and trickery than the actual getting some sexual action. Looking back, it was quite disappointing and basically brazen stupidity. But hey, I was an alcoholic just learning the ropes.
You will not admit it to yourself until you commit a consequence out of that addiction. It can be disappointing. But once you have accepted it, things will be better for you.
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